The SPEECH

As we approach the door and are about to go in

I pull my kids aside so we can have this little talk again.

Here I go giving this speech for the ump-teenth time .

By now they’ve heard it so much , they can recite it like a nursery rhyme.

I make eye contact with all three of them to make sure I have their attention.

And I try to use small words to avoid any miscomprehension.

“Now listen kids, before we go into this grocery store

I’m telling you one time and I’m not saying this anymore.

Don’t go in this place acting a fool.

I’m talking to each of you... Keke, Jamal and Abdul.

When you get inside , keep your hands to yourselves.

And I don’t want to see any of you riding on carts or climbing up shelves.

When we pass by a fountain , don’t act like you’re thirsty and beg for a drink.

Because when we’re at home and I give you water, you just pour it down the sink.

Before we get in this store ..now HEAR THIS REAL GOOD BOYS,

Don’t ask for any candy, chips or those over-priced toys.

When you see peanut butter and jelly jars don’t take off the lids.

Don’t  act like you’ve lost your minds and suddenly turn into Bebe’s Kids.

Now, Mommy won’t be in here long. Can you be good today ?”

They all looked at me with big, bright eyes, smiled and said , “OKAY !”

When I get the cart and start pushing it through the store

I swear they acted like they had never seen one before.

While Jamal is climbing on front, Abdul is hanging onside.

Keke curled on the bottom rack as if he’s on a bobsled ride.

I said, “What did I just tell you before we came in here ?

I thought I had made myself perfectly clear.

Didn’t I say that ya’ll better act right ?

So GET OFF THIS BASKET , walk and don’t start touching everything in sight !”

As we walked down the first aisle, things went well for about a minute.

Until I stopped and reached for some salad dressing and Keke said “Let me get it.”

That boy acted like he had no sense.

He started climbing up that shelf like it was a chain-link fence.

I grabbed him by the butt and pulled him down to the floor

And told him I better not see him climbing up grocery shelves anymore.

When we went down the cereal aisle things started to turn bad

They all forgot everything I told them at the door and had suddenly gone mad.

They started yelling for Cheerios and Apple Jacks

Cinnamon Toast Crunch and Sugar Smacks.

I said, “Boys, ya’ll better stop it ! Quit begging ! Hold up! ”

Then Abdul grabbed a box and yelled,” Mommy can we have a Fruit Roll-Up ?”

I saw where this was headed and I began to move as fast as I can

People were looking at me as if I were a mad man.

I began throwing grocery in that cart, making shots like Michael Jordan.

I was turning corners on two wheels and driving like Jeff Gordon.

The kids started running beside me while yelling, “Mommy why are you going so fast ?”

They said ,”We’re getting out of breath Mommy ! We don’t think we can last !”

I flew by the cookie aisle because I do have a brain.

If they smelled those chocolate chips they would definitely go insane.

Now, only one more stop to make . I needed milk, butter and orange juice.

I was full steam ahead, driving this train and they were gasping for air at caboose.

Now I’m at the checkout aisle hoping there was nothing I omitted.

I thought, if there’s something I didn’t have , then I’ll just have to forget it.

I’m third in line catching my breath and seeing victory at the front door.

The trip through the store was over and there was nothing else they could ask for.

Then, all of a sudden I snapped to my senses and realized things were about to get worse.

As we’re waiting in line I see racks filled with candy as they all screamed “Starburst !”

There were Snicker Bars, Air Heads and a colored piece of sugar called a Skittle.

Racks overflowed with sweets about waist high to me but eye level to someone who’s little.

This just didn’t happen by chance. Having this much candy at a checkout aisle.

I was put there on purpose and with only 2 cashiers, they knew you’d be there a while.

They started crying, kicking and screaming, “Mommy can we have some ?”

I said, “NO ! Put down those Tic Tacs, Jamal !  Abdul, don’t open that Bubble Yum !”

Suddenly, I realized Keke was extremely quiet and that boy never shuts up.

I pulled him to me, pried open his mouth and found a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup.

The other two boys looked shocked and together they said “ooooo !”

Mommy, you let Keke have candy, why can’t we have some toooo !”

Now, I’ve  finally  paid for my grocery and I’m leaving the cashier.

The lads are crying but I don’t care. I’m thinking, “Hooray. I’ve made it out of here.”

As I’m smiling and approaching the door,  I feel a frown come on my face.

I see a giant gumball machine. Now, who would put that in this place ?

As we passed the machine they dropped to the floor and asked ,”Can we please have a quarter ?”

Their tiny faces were all covered with tears. I didn’t know eyes could produce that much water.

I gave a quarter each to Jamal and Abdul. Keke said, “What about me ?”

I said, “Remember that candy you ate in the store ? Did you think you it was free ?”

With grocery loaded and kids buckled in, we’re finally on our way. 

While I’m driving home I gave them a piece of my mind about their behavior today.

I went on and on about how I wanted each of them to become responsible men.

I told them when they’re grown and become parents that they would understand then.

I told them that I didn’t want them falling off shopping carts and busting their head.

And how I didn’t feel like leaving home to buy grocery and coming back with one of them dead.

I explained to Keke if he keeps on stealing that he was going to spend some serious time in jail.

I told him when they haul his little butt off in handcuffs he better not call me for bail.

I knew my words must have really caught their attention because I didn’t hear a sound, not a peep.

Until we got home and I opened their door and found they were all asleep.

Retire ? Say What ?????

It Ain’t Ova

In the movie, The Shawshank Redemption, there is a line that the character Andy Dufresne says : “ You can get busy living or get busy dying.” If you’re  planning and investing in retiring , quitting, getting sick, old and dying then you are busy living but you won’t be for long. 

First of all,  WHY are  people spending their lives striving to quit  after 65 earth-years of existence ?  We didn’t arrive here with an expiration date stamped on our butt or a message that read “discard after 65  years”,  but there are  some  who can’t wait until they get there so they can retire. I’ve heard of people who die soon after they retire. They were healthy and vibrant at their job, retired at the age of 65 because that’s what they were told to do and then they die within a year. For most people RETIREMENT is just corporate assisted suicide.   

Let me tell you what the word RETIRE is synonymous with.

absent oneself, decamp, deny oneself, depart, draw back, ebb, exit, fall back, get away, get off, give ground, give way, go, go away, hand over, leave service, make vacant, part, pull back, pull out, recede, regress, relinquish, remove, repeal, rescind, resign, retreat, revoke, run along, rusticate, secede, seclude oneself, separate, sever connections, stop working, surrender, take off, turn in, withdraw, yield

Last time I checked we are supposed to be here , productive and healthy , way past 100. Moses was said to live to 120 and had his sight and his strength,  he was still able to climb mountains and he didn’t have health insurance ! He had health ASSURANCE. That’s what you get when you have FAITH in good health and you act like it. 

Now most people have heard the statement  “If you don’t use it you lose it.”  Whether you believe it or not it’s a for certain truth .

For example look at a car...if you park it and don’t use it for a long , long while, when you do try to start the motor you will have to do some work to get it to start and it may never run the same as it did when it was used often. There are folks who played musical instruments in high school and once they graduated they stopped .  As time goes by, they lose the ability to play like they used to. I played the clarinet and right now the only note I  remember how to blow is G and that’s because you press NO keys...you just put the mouthpiece in your mouth and blow. The law is real. If you don’t use it you lose it. 

If you don’t use your muscles for a long time they will  atrophy or become weak and when you do try to use them it becomes a real struggle. Same with your bones...they become brittle and break easily when you don’t use them.  You see,  people who are considered “elderly” don’t  fall and break their bones...their bones break and then they fall. They become brittle from lack of use.

But, my brothers and sisters, we have been convinced by some bodies  that if we stop being productive at 65, if we stop being of useful service to others at 65, that is a good thing for us. Well tell me, if we’re here and not of service then what are we good for ? 

We can only sit on the beach so long. We can read only so many books and sleep only so long. At 65 we are NOT over and done with by any stretch of the imagination. WE are very ready and able to DO. Do what ? Anything we WANT to do physically and mentally. 

We can do far more than get prescriptions filled every month. We can do far more than waste away in a retirement home. We get stuck in those predicaments because we have accepted and believed another human beings VISION of what our life is supposed to be like at a particular age. They say at 65 we are supposed to withdraw from action and we do. Instead of being useful we voluntarily become useless .

I met a man selling his variety of goods at a very large flea market here. He had a vintage sling-shot in its original box for sell. I opened the box and picked up the sling-shot and he told me to make sure I did NOT pull the rubber band back since it was very old and might break. He said he could sell it for more money with the band intact . He told me the sling shot was very “valuable  because it was very old.” I thought about his statement for a moment and  told him too bad we don’t feel the same way about ourselves. He agreed.

We have cars 30 or 40 years old , we call them classics, and sell them for nice sums of money because they are  old. When furniture gets old, we call it nice names like vintage or antique and  sell for top dollar  When cars and  items  are old and actually WORK you have hit the jackpot ! 

Quite the contrary applies to us . When we humans get old, older than those cars and sling shots WE make, we are not considered MORE valuable and as a matter of fact we are encouraged to quit, to cease, to retire. We are expected to STOP working, urged to withdraw and just plain go away. 

How can the creation be greater than the creator ? WE create these things or actually we just reassemble the items which were already here when we got here. I mean , we didn’t create trees but we can turn them into paper or create a desk from them.

There are pieces of paper that are worth millions of dollars and kept behind secure shields . Those particular pieces of paper were made by men but are MORE valuable than a mans life since we will kill each other for the pieces of paper.

What makes the paper or car or old furniture so valuable ? Our thoughts about them. They are valuable because we say they are and believe they are and act as if they are.  With all of that, and with so many of us believing, it has no choice but to be so.

What makes us worth-less at 65 ? Our thoughts about ourselves. We are worth-less because we believe we are, we say we are and we act as if we are.  With all of that, it has no choice but to also be so.

Without humans, the paper DOES NOTHING . Neither does the old Civil War uniform nor the antique Winchester Rifle. But they are cherished like fine wine and  we also say it “gets better with age.”  Man develops a way to turn grapes into wine and , with age, the wine becomes more valuable than that same man. Only because man says so. The grapes said nothing.

You can tell a tree by the fruit it produces. What fruit are you producing if you ain’t working. How can you be fruitful if you are not working  ? 

When HE said to “be fruitful and multiply” it did not simply mean for us  to go out there and make a bunch of babies. HE meant to produce. To bring forth. We produce our thoughts. We create.  We are asked to create and in abundance. The statement does not read ” be fruitful and multiply until you reach the age of 65 then get your old, decrepit ass out of the way.”

Many people retire because that’s what everybody said they were supposed to do, but they would rather be productive and keep on working. I heard somewhere  that the opposite of courage is not  cowardice but , conformity. Conformity...doing what everybody else is doing. You conform    because you’re AFRAID to be different.  

People are also AFRAID of what is going to happen when they “retire” at 65. Are they going to be able to eat ? People worry about where they’re  going to live or most likely “die.” I thought Christ said to pray like this  “give us this day our daily bread.”  Also, when God rained manna , He told the Israelites to only take enough for the day and NOT to try to store up anything for the next day because it would surely spoil. HE said not to worry about tomorrow and let each day take care of itself.

Right now,  folks are 35 years young and worrying about what they are   going to eat , not just today,  but 10,950 days from now when they reach the 65 year mark and decide to withdraw.  That’s too much !! Remember HE said “Give us THIS DAY our daily bread.”

If you’re  65 , healthy and enjoy what you are doing , why stop ? If you’re 65, healthy and do NOT enjoy what you are doing then you can do one of two things. Either change what you are doing or change how you feel about it. If you hate it , you can always teach yourself to LOVE it since YOU’re the one who taught yourself to hate it in the first place . 

People really DO need people. All people are people people. ( You might have to read that again slowly)

You see , at home we have tons of distractions to keep us away from each other but at work there are generally fewer distractions and work is really ALL about PEOPLE. The PEOPLE we work with and the PEOPLE we are providing the product or services to. 

We CREATE. We create things to help others create. 

 When we cease to be useful we die. Once we cease mentally we then cease physically. Our physical only does what our mental tells it to. 

 What happens to water that stops moving ? You know, it becomes old, stagnant, diseased. Our human body composition is  around 70 % water. What do you think happens to it when it stops moving ? Same thing. Water is still water and can only behave as water. 

If we shutdown mentally or spiritually then the physical naturally becomes of no use and it shuts down too. Physical condition is directly related to spiritual condition. Physical only does what it is TOLD to do by YOU.

Stagnation is death to us. We must keep dreaming, keep moving, keep growing , keep changing... or we die. When you have no more dreams you stop creating. When you can no longer be fruitful and multiply, also known as create, you disappear or “fade into the sunset” since you have no more dreams for YOU. You write yourself out of your own script .

I had a conversation with a gentleman who has been here only 65 years. He told me he had  “retired” once for two years and that was the most miserable time of his life. He had retired at 62 because that’s what he thought he was supposed to do. He was a construction worker and when he retired he gained a lot of weight. He said his joints ached also but he had none of those problems when he had worked. Well, after about 2 years of this he took himself out of misery and went back to work in construction. He will be 66 this year and he told me he lost all of that weight he gained while sitting at home with nothing to do and nowhere to go everyday. He said he feels great working and that was the best decision he ever made...to go back to work and be of use.

Just when we reach the age where we actually do begin to understand how life works and how to really create we then decide to check ourselves out of the game and not participate. We are still babies who have just learned how to standup on their own but before we take our very first step we quit. We decide standing is our endpoint of life. 

We all have so much to share and we all love sharing knowledge but when the knowledge base is really valuable and overflowing (like an old treasure chest) we throw it out into the streets to be swept up like the rest of the trash. Our very own thoughts are so self-destructive. 

Life is made to be experienced. If  we do not live we never experience. 

Experience comes from living life and anything else is just hearsay. We are not experiencing life if we are just regurgitating what somebody told us . Repeating Others experiences or His-Story.  Saying What THEY say. Well, What do you say ??

To really know we must experience and there are infinite experiences to be had while we are here. They don’t have to stop after only 65 years of being. This is when the party is ready to get started . Keep moving and stop quitting for NO apparent reason.  

We didn’t make this trip to elevate physically. We made this journey for spiritual growth. If you know what you’re doing then act like it, move like it, look like it and feel like it. 

Who said we were here for only ONE purpose ? We have whatever purpose WE say we have and in this lifetime we have already had many. Every step we take has intent.We’re headed somewhere for some purpose. As long as we keep stepping we will have many purposes.  

You can choose to cease or retire if you want to and think you are living the life of luxury by doing nothing useful everyday but, just remember, the fresh clean flowing water and that your body is 70 % water. Remember what happens when the water retires and ceases to flow. 

Life . If  you don’t use it, You Lose it !

Live it.